Parental Examples (1st Thessalonians 2:7-12)
INTRODUCTION:
Paul begins chapter two of 1st Thessalonians by defending his ministry that was under attack by those who opposed the gospel. This attack was directed at undermining Paul’s integrity and authority so that the newly formed church would lose faith in their founder. In Paul’s defense we saw five virtues of a true spiritual leader, virtues displayed by Paul and by his co-workers, Silas and Timothy, as they shared the gospel in Thessalonica and discipled the church before they were forced to leave. The five virtues we saw displayed in their lives were tenacity or persistence, integrity, authority, accountability, and humility. But truly effective spiritual leadership requires more than just a virtuous life, it also requires action. In our passage this morning Paul outlines the outward functions or actions of the godly spiritual leader as he backs his virtues with action. Instead of talking about his and his companions preaching, discipling, protecting, and overseeing this new church, Paul instead uses a metaphor to show these very actions that were carried out by Paul, Silas, and Timothy during their time in Thessalonica. Paul could have chosen any number of metaphors to show this, but he chose to use the metaphor of a mother and a father with which he illustrates the primary kinds of spiritual care a leader must provide for his people. Paul uses metaphors throughout his epistles to illustrate different spiritual truths and his use here of a mother and father emphasizes the care and affection of shared life that he had with those to whom he brought the gospel. Let’s pray and then read our passage for this morning.
--PRAY--
SCRIPTURE:
Turn in your Bibles this morning to 1st Thessalonians 2:7-12. Please, if you are able, stand in honor of the reading of God’s Word and follow along as I read.
1st Thessalonians 2:7-12,
“But we proved to be gentle among you, as a nursing mother tenderly cares for her own children. Having so fond an affection for you, we were well-pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of God but also our own lives, because you had become very dear to us. For you recall, brethren, our labor and hardship, how working night and day so as not to be a burden to any of you, we proclaimed to you the gospel of God. You are witnesses, and so is God, how devoutly and uprightly and blamelessly we behaved toward you believers; just as you know how we were exhorting and encouraging and imploring each one of you as a father would his own children, so that you would walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory.” (1 Thessalonians 2:7–12, NASB95)[1]
A MOTHER’S GENTLENESS (1st Thessalonians 2:7)
Paul begins verse seven with the word “but” which again contrasts Paul, Silas, and Timothy’s conduct with the sinful behavior of the false teachers of the day. Paul is reminding the Thessalonian believers that they came to them with no ulterior motives, they did not come seeking glory, or money, or fame, they came only to share with them the gospel which had been entrusted to them. Paul goes on in verse seven to say that they proved to be gentle among them, and Paul compares their gentleness to the gentleness of a nursing mother. This word gentle is the main thing that Paul wants us to see in this verse. To be gentle means to be kind to someone, but it also possesses a multitude of other virtues. Some of the virtues of gentle are: acceptance, respect, compassion, tolerance of imperfections, patience, tenderheartedness, and loyalty. Unlike the “spiritual” teachers of Paul’s day, Paul and his companions had not come to the Thessalonians to exploit them for their own prosperity, but they came to live and serve among them with kindness. Paul writes that the gentleness that he showed to the Thessalonians was comparable to a nursing mother who tenderly cares for her own children. This phrase “her own children” shows that Paul was not a paid surrogate mother or like today’s hired day care worker. Paul is saying that he showed the same feelings as a nursing mother shows her baby when he cared for the Thessalonians’ spiritual needs. Just as good parents are concerned about their children and their physical and spiritual well-being, in the same way good spiritual leaders are concerned for those under their care. It is interesting to note that the phrase “tenderly cares” literally means to warm with body heat. The loving mother would take the little infant in her arms and warm the child with her own body heat as the child nursed. This metaphor is a beautiful picture for us of the kind of care the Thessalonian believers received from Paul and his companions. Unlike those who were opposed to the gospel who were harsh and indifferent toward the new believers, Paul, Silas, and Timothy tenderly cared for and nurtured the members of the newly founded church.
A mother’s affection (1st Thessalonians 2:8a)
Paul builds on his metaphor of a nursing mother and he does so by giving us the mother’s motive for such nurturing gentleness, the motive is love. Just as a mother loves her child and gently cares for the infant, Paul writes that he has a fond affection for the Thessalonian believers. The naturally fond affection or love that a mother has for her infant son or daughter is like no other love in any other human context. The phrase “fond affection” that Paul uses here is a term that means to long for someone passionately and earnestly, and as Paul attaches it to a mother’s love for her children, it is intended to give us a picture of an affection so deep and captivating as to be incomparable with any other love.
God naturally made mothers with this intimate or fond affection in their hearts for their children. The hearts of all godly spiritual leaders are supernaturally given this type of fond affection for those to whom they minister, just as Paul and his companions had this love for those who belonged to Christ in Thessalonica.
A MOTHER’S SACRIFICIAL LOVE (1st Thessalonians 2:8b)
The fond affection that Paul and his companions had for their readers was not out of a sense of obligation. Their ministry in Thessalonica was not because they were obligated to share the gospel out of a sense of duty, this was more than Paul and his companions merely doing their duty as God’s messengers. Paul writes that they were well-pleased to impart the gospel of God to the Thessalonian people. They were eager and zealous to give the good news of a transformed life in Christ to those whom God sent them. The word “impart” is translated from a Greek verb that means to share, or to give someone something of which the giver retains a part. When a Christian shares truth, God’s truth with someone, that is exactly what take place. When you give someone the good news of salvation, you do not lose possession of it yourself.
Paul, Silas and Timothy were imparting to the Thessalonians the gospel of God and yet in doing so they retained those truths, even strengthening them by the giving which formed a loving, mutually edifying fellowship with those who accepted the message and put their faith in Christ. When Paul speaks of the gospel of God, he is referring to the fullness of what is the doctrine of salvation, which includes justification, sanctification, and glorification. By imparting the gospel of God, Paul and his co-workers were fulfilling the great commission by making disciples of all nations and teaching them to observe all that Christ had commanded them. They exhorted the Thessalonians to repent and in faith accept Christ’s death and resurrection on their behalf which results in justification. They taught the new believers how to live holy lives in obedience to God’s Word and in the power of the Holy Spirit which would result in their sanctification, and finally they taught them to wait for their eternal glory at the glorious coming of the Lord Jesus Christ for His beloved church which would result in their glorification.
But more than just imparting the gospel of God to these believers, Paul writes that he and his companions also shared their own lives with them, literally it reads that they gave up their own souls, in other words, they would have done anything for the Thessalonian believers, they ministered to them with a sacrificial love. The same way a mother sacrificially loves her children, often at great cost to herself, she unselfishly and generously sets aside her life and her dreams for the benefit of her children. This is especially true of an infant whose mother provides nourishing milk and cares for the infant’s every need.
Paul ministered with the same attitude of all-out commitment because the Thessalonian believers had become very dear to him, just as a baby does to his or her mother. These words “very dear” add to the pictures and descriptions intended by the apostle to unmistakably demonstrate the heart of a godly spiritual leader.
A MOTHER’S SELFLESS LABOR (1st Thessalonians 2:9)
Paul continues using the metaphor of a mother and in verse nine calls on the Thessalonian believers to remember, to recall the time that Paul, Silas, and Timothy were among them, ministering to them, he urges them to remember the labor and hardship that Paul and his companions endured as they worked night and day. Paul uses this verse as proof of his affection for the believers and that they were very dear to him, and he urges them to recall the character of the ministry that he had among them. He uses the words labor and hardship to sum up the work in Thessalonica. The term labor emphasizes the difficulty of a particular task itself, and hardship speaks of the struggle and toil to carry out that task. These two words emphasize not only the loving concern of a mother for her children, but also shows that her concern is carried out by her selfless labor to provide for her children. Every mother knows there is no price her children could pay her for what she does for them. Not only is there no price, but she expects no payment for nursing them, for tenderly caring for them, for displaying a deep affection for them, or for embracing their every need sacrificially in heartfelt love. In the same way, Paul tells these believers in Thessalonica that he and his co-ministers eagerly ministered to them with no desire for compensation that they had a right to receive. Paul explains this even further in 2nd Thessalonians 3:7-9 when he wrote, “For you yourselves know how you ought to follow our example, because we did not act in an undisciplined manner among you, nor did we eat anyone’s bread without paying for it, but with labor and hardship we kept working night and day so that we would not be a burden to any of you; not because we do not have the right to this, but in order to offer ourselves as a model for you, so that you would follow our example.” (2 Thessalonians 3:7–9, NASB95)[2]
Paul received gifts from the church in Philippi which he and his companions lived on as well as what Paul could earn in his trade as a tentmaker. Paul and his co-workers stayed in Thessalonica longer than just the three weeks that Paul spoke in the synagogue, so he would have had time to set up his tent making business, and working night and day with his hands, he supported himself and his companions. Paul did not want to be a burden on these new believers, so he supported himself and his companions while teaching these new Christians the gospel of God, again the doctrine of our salvation: justification, sanctification, and glorification.
In these first three verses Paul uses the metaphor of a mother to describe the ministry of care provided by Silas, Timothy, and himself. These three made the utmost effort to provide gentleness, fond affection, sacrificial love, and selfless hard-working provision as they proclaimed to the Thessalonian church the gospel of God. This metaphor of a mother’s tender care of her own children only partially describes the effective spiritual leader. Paul now moves forward to describe the spiritual leader as a father which completes the description of leadership that Paul is illustrating for us.
A father’s example (1st Thessalonians 2:10)
Paul begins these last three verses in our passage by using the metaphor of a father to picture the actions of godly spiritual leaders. As with all leaders, it is the duty of a father to lead by example and by so doing he sets the standard for those in his family to follow. This is also a duty or responsibility of a spiritual leader to his people. Understanding this Paul calls on the Thessalonian believers to remember how he, and Silas, and Timothy had conducted themselves when they were with them. This is the third time that Paul has called on these believers to remember his time with them. In verse one he reminded them that they knew that his coming to them was not in vain, in verse nine he asked them to recall the labor and hardship of his ministry among them, and now he calls them to be witnesses along with the omniscient God to how he and his companions lived among them. Paul wanted them to remember the example of godly living they had set for them as their spiritual leaders.
Paul pointed both to the firsthand knowledge of these believers and to the perfect insight of God into how devoutly and uprightly and blamelessly Paul, Silas, and Timothy had behaved toward these believers. Devoutly refers to a pious or holy manner of living and used here emphasizes how these three men lived before God. The word uprightly means righteously and refers to how Paul, Silas, and Timothy lived righteously before God and man by following and obeying God’s Word in the power of the Holy Spirit. Finally, the term blamelessly relates to their reputation before people. In every respect as the Thessalonian believers had witnessed these men were exemplary spiritual fathers, their example set the standard for all spiritual leaders after them to follow.
A FATHER’S INSTRUCTION (1st Thessalonians 2:11)
Paul in stating, “as a father would his own children” at the end of verse 11, is telling us the natural, normal function of a father concerned for the well-being of his own children. Fathers are not only to be examples to their children, but they are to be instructors as well. The spiritual leader is also an instructor and motivator, and Paul uses three verbs to describe how a father instructs and motivates his own children and this is what Paul had done continually while he was with the church in Thessalonica.
The first verb that he used to describe a father’s instruction was “exhorting.” This word is translated from a Greek word that means to come alongside. It is related to the Greek noun which means “one who comes alongside” which is one of the titles of the Holy Spirit used by Jesus and others in the Bible. Paul uses this verb to refer to coming alongside a child for the purpose of helping them, directing and instructing them in how they conduct themselves and in helping them develop a godly character.
The verb translated encouraging is a word that means to encourage in the sense of giving comfort and consoling the person being encouraged. This is so important in helping someone in their spiritual growth because of the many obstacles and failures Christians can experience. The apostle John used this word in John 11 to describe how Jesus comforted and consoled the grieving family of Lazarus. This word is mainly used in the sense of tender, restorative, compassionate uplifting needed by a struggling, burdened, brokenhearted person. As fathers we need to have this type of encouragement toward our children to comfort and console them in the many disappointments that come into a growing child’s life. This expression of fatherly kindness also fits the spiritual leader as he deals with the disappointments of the believer as he faces obstacles and failures in his or her life.
The third verb Paul uses describing a father’s instruction to his children is the verb imploring. Paul reminded the believers in Thessalonica that he had been imploring each one of them. Imploring comes from a Greek word that is often translated “testifying” or “witnessing” and relates more to warning against turning away from the life to which God had called you. To deliberately not obeying God’s word, to giving into temptation repeatedly. Paul warned the new believers that this would bring God’s discipline, just as not heeding the warning of our earthly fathers results in discipline.
A FATHER’S DESIRE (1st Thessalonians 2:12)
Paul in this final verse of this passage voices his desire, his goal in conducting himself as he has described himself in this passage, his desire is the spiritual maturity of his spiritual children in the faith. Just as a godly father desires to see his children mature and become men and women who are devout in their faith, and upright and blameless in their walk with God and with men, so a godly spiritual leader wants to see this in the people God has given into his care.
Paul says that he conducted himself as he did so that the believers in Thessalonica would walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls them into His own kingdom and glory. To walk in a manner worthy refers to our daily conduct, seeking to please God, obey Him, and follow His guidance in our lives, in other words growing or maturing in the grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ. Paul again references the fact that the Thessalonian believers were chosen by God, again referring to their election by God who calls them.
Paul finishes by telling the believers what they are called to by God, they are called to God’s own kingdom and glory. God’s call, as always, refers to His call to salvation. In answering God’s call through the faith, He graciously and sovereignly grants to us, we are transformed, we are justified, we are sanctified, and here Paul states the singular end of that call, which is entrance into God’s own kingdom and glory. As believers, the Thessalonian Christians had not yet seen the millennial kingdom or the eternal kingdom, but they were already citizens of the redeemed kingdom over which God now rules. Because of this they have had a present share in the glory of God through the indwelling Holy Spirit and they have a promise of the future glory in the kingdom yet to come. All genuine Christians look forward to sharing in the full glory of the heavenly kingdom when God raises us to be like the Lord Jesus Christ and to be with Him for eternity. This is my hope, and my desire is that this is your hope as well.
CONCLUSION:
In this passage Paul used a mother and father as a parental example of spiritual leadership. This example clearly demonstrates that leadership in the church must be balanced. It cannot lean too much to the mothering side or too much to the fathering side. In other words, it is not enough for spiritual leaders to just be compassionate, tender, and caring, as spiritual mothers. Their lives must also be uncompromising in their convictions, pure and upright in their conduct. Their lives must, in their motives and actions, set a standard for all to follow. On top of their example, they need to teach the truth faithfully, building up the saints in spiritual wisdom and displaying the courage of conviction to come along side and exhort and call their people to obedience. They must comfort and console those who are discouraged and always implore each one to walk worthy of God’s call to them into His own kingdom and glory. Spiritual leaders must be both spiritual mothers and fathers to those God has placed under their care. Peter said it this way to the spiritual leaders who were the readers of his epistle, he wrote in 1st Peter 5:1-4, “Therefore, I exhort the elders among you, as your fellow elder and witness of the sufferings of Christ, and a partaker also of the glory that is to be revealed, shepherd the flock of God among you, exercising oversight not under compulsion, but voluntarily, according to the will of God; and not for sordid gain, but with eagerness; nor yet as lording it over those allotted to your charge, but proving to be examples to the flock. And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory.” (1 Peter 5:1–4, NASB95)[3]
[1]New American Standard Bible: 1995 Update. La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation, 1995.
[2]New American Standard Bible: 1995 Update. La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation, 1995.
[3]New American Standard Bible: 1995 Update. La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation, 1995.